Showing posts with label waiting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label waiting. Show all posts

Tuesday, October 9, 2018

Three words I'm not not fond of

"wait and see" is soooo hard. Each step of this process is really waiting for the next thing.. waiting for a call from a nurse, waiting to see if things are progressing properly, waiting, waiting!

Yesterdays scan showed that there are 5 follicles ... 2 x 6mm, 8mm, 12mm and 15mm ... the smaller ones really need to catch up to the others :o I hope that they can.... I was disappointed with this as the Gonal F dosage is so much higher I was expecting there to be more. But it only takes one good egg right :) {Please Lord}

My blood test showed that the LH (Luteinising hormone - which helps follicles to mature) is low and so today I am going in to the clinic AGAIN to pick up a new medication (luveris) to inject ... Apparently it's a bit different so I will need a nurse to do the first one for me :0

Have been feeling quite yukky these last few days - headaches, sore tummy, nauseous, very TIRED! It's a tough time really but hopefully for a good reason!

A dear friend sent me these wonderful verses yesterday...
Psalm 145:17-18 The Lord is Righteous in all his ways and faithful in all he does.
The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth.

Monday, October 1, 2018

Anticipation

Well it's ALMOST time to start IVF again.. tomorrow I go into the clinic for my day 1 blood test. I spoke with a nurse today who said show up for morning clinic tomorrow.. which is between 7am and 9am - so the trips into the city will start again. The waiting will start again.

I'm feeling a little apprehensive, I'm feeling hopeful and excited, I'm praying that this time will be the time that works, where we might be blessed with a little miracle! Please Lord!


Thinking about the prospect of waiting again, I'm reminded it is a good lesson for waiting upon the LORD and hoping in him. I do hope that we will have a child but ultimately whether we do or don't my hope is in the Lord and waiting on his return. I would like to think I will remember this amidst the frustration of waiting. Many times in my life I've thought that I am a rather patient person... but life keeps showing me that I am far from a patient person!!!

More encouragement from Psalm 39, verses 4 & 5

4  " Oh Lord, make me know my end and what is the measure of my days ; let me know how fleeting I am!" 5 "Behold you have made my days a few handbreadths and my lifetime is nothing before you. Surely all mankind stands as a mere breath!"

What seems like forever in these moments and days and weeks of waiting is nothing in the light of eternity. What seems to matter so dearly now living on this earth will one day seem so tiny!

Wednesday, August 22, 2018

A day in my life of IVF treatments

Guy's alarm went off at 5:30 and I got up and had a shower... then did my injections.

(Each other day my alarm has been going off at 5:45am and I get up and do the injections before going back to bed again OR into the city for blood tests .. and a surprise scan on Monday).

I ate some toast .. a bread mix from Aldi.. Not too bad- it's a Tiger loaf.

Guy dropped me at Rockdale and I was on the train at 6:13am

6:37 - Arrived at Town hall and walked to the clinic
6:47 - Arrived at Kent St and scanned the QR code to check in then sat to wait for the lift to open at 7am. There were already about  7 people here. Actually spoke to a couple of people today .. about the QR scan thing :)

7am and up we go - two lifts today and not as packed as the last time I arrived this early :)
The names start to be called and I am about 3rd.

Time for the most invasive part of the day! The internal ultrasound to check the follicles.. on Monday there were 5 on the left and 2 on the right.. Today there are 2 big follicles on the right and three less big ones on the left with some smaller ones on the left as well. The sonographer asked during the scan if I'd had scans before we started IVF and I said yes .. not really sure why she was asking but didn't think any more of it.

7:14 and the Ultrasound is done - back in the queue for my Blood test..

R is the collector (aka Vampire) today .. she says that the computer says I need TLC .. She's not so sure about the deep vein in my inner arm (which has been the most successful for the good vampires so far) and she wants to try a thinner vein on the side of my arm ... she Umms and Ahha and eventually does go for the side one with a butterfly needle on an angle ... it's pretty slow but works. Afterwards it's quite sore. She tells me the usual don't lift heavy items and also tells me to ice it when I get home and to look after my veins.. (I feel like she knows that vein was a poor choice).
7:32 all done and leave ... the arm is quite painful as I walk...

7:48 - Back at Town Hall Platform 4 .. the next train doesn't stop at Rockdale :(
Next train is due at 7:54 :) Lots of people are waiting today.
My arm is hurting a bit :(

The train comes and I sneak into a quiet carriage.. sitting in the main bit near the door - no one else is here - wierd but peaceful :)

8:46 - walked in the door at home after walking back from Rockdale Station! I put an ice pack on the arm and settle on the couch with a Rooibos and a couple of chocolate Chia balls.

Around the middle of the day I had a private call ... it was Dr Rowan ... I wonder why she's calling not the nurse but she wanted to talk to me about the cycle.. the two larger follicles are ready trigger.. the smaller ones are not .. and would probably not produce mature eggs.. however if we waited we would lose the lead ones.. If we were to go ahead Egg collection would be on Friday - usually she would recommend cancelling the cycle but as we don't want to freeze lots of embryos then we could go ahead.. but theres another problem... the sonographer saw something on the scan that might be a polyp in the lining of my uterus .. this was not there before.. this could cause the embryo not to implant .... which would mean that if we go ahead with the Egg collection and there are embryos we may need to freeze them and have the polyp dealt with. but we can't know more yet, she may be able to tell more at Egg Collection. I let her know that I didn't want to cancel and she said she would go ahead and arrange for it to happen Friday and would try her best to get the two eggs for us.
I got off the phone.. in a bit of a shock and phoned Guy to tell him... He also didn't think we should cancel either. got off to wait for nurses call... Wondering if it's the right decision.. cancelling would be cheaper but all it takes is for one Egg to work (although realistically the chances are low).
I phoned Mum to talk about it and she also agreed that going ahead was a good option...
Missed the call from the nurses and phoned back... it goes to voicemail.. so I left a message..

Tried again a little later.. same deal.

Eventually a nurse phoned back..and said that Egg collection would go ahead on Friday but she didn't know what time yet and would let me know once it was booked in with Day Surgery... Trigger would happen tonight but she would tell me the time once she knew the Surgery time.

She phoned back again about an hour later.. EC would be at 7:30 Friday.. so Trigger was to happen at 7:30pm tonight. NO more of the other injections.

The Ovidrel (trigger shot) is similar to the Gonal F I had been taking in the pen.. you wind it up .. this one had no numbers though just //'s I went until it said 250 and then stuck it in my belly.. it stung a little more but otherwise was ok.

BACK to waiting.. but no more injections now till possibly after the Egg Collection on Friday so a nice little break.

What I thought would be a typical day of IVF was definitely NOT ... I guess there really are no "typical" days on this journey! It's definitely a ROLLERCOASTER!


Friday, August 10, 2018

IVF season

We are about to enter a new season ... IVF will be starting any day now. As soon as AF arrives I will be heading to the clinic for a blood test and will start hormone injections.. two injections a day for about 10-14 days :0 ... I "think" this is better than the nasal spray + injection last time ... although 8-9 years are a little foggy in my brain!

I'm feeling excitedly hopeful and yet nervously terrified!!

I know that God has this... he is totally in control. I just need to keep trusting him and knowing that no matter what happens he will give us all that we need to perservere!